Passion of The Past

There seemed moments of  passion to connect with the past when the present and even more the future didn't make much sense ! Living in the present seemed mechanical and the future seemed even more thought less ! 

The churning started  and helped to figure out the process of who  I am !  I seemed ... not like many .. the way I think , work, speak ... even my birth star,  my Jataka seemed not saying much .. where to get the answers ?? What is this life about .... ?? 

PARAMACHAARYA ..........

I connected a bit to Paramacharya , as a monk who gave my name ... who is he ? why this name  he gave? Why he should name me ? what is the basis ? How can I speak to him ... he doesn't seem to be there to communicate with ... all the more the curiosity seemed looming for very very very old people past generations .........what is that I want from them ....an answer to what is happening with this life ....their affection ..their thoughts  and wisdom of the present seemed incomplete and future is just future ..... 

It seems a bit perplexing yet logical ..... we seem to connect more with our grand parents through love , fond memories and more ! 

MONKS

I visited many monks ... whoever came around the place I was in Bangalore ... I visited many just to do Namaskar ! I was called in and then Many gave me some interesting suggestions ...some regarding book related to Hindu Dharma 

GOTRA RISHIS :

What was this craving for ancient wisdom ! Why this desire to connect with the oldest of the old even to the extent of Gotra Rishis ... and even more to the back  ! There is a grilling inside ... I asked Appaji , he wanted me to go to Brihadeeswar temple and meditate ... may be there is belief that many devatas ( none other than some oldish scholars ...who qualified them selves to happiness and some standards and hence prayed to for their achievements and qualifications .. may be through Ashtottaras and more ) descend to the ground level and hence they close the temple prakara night times .... also it was a huge campus ! I went there along with my cousin (Ramana Bava ) but too briefly scorching under the sun .. I ran shadow less from one temple mandap to other .. finally could sit under a tree for some time .. But then time us as my cousin had to leave ! Second time I went with family from Trichy yet ... it seemed more jolly trip than for meditation ! 

At a later point of time when I asked BalaPeriyava the same question .. he said we connect with them through "Äachara .. Vichaaara" ....an answer that gave me immediate realization .. that I connected very less with the monk who gave my name !  I read many books of H.H. ... some peace prevailed !